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How To Be More Confident In 18 Simple Steps

“Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand brake on.”

– Maxwell Maltz

No one is born with unlimited confidence, it’s something we draw from our environment, upbringing and much more. Being confident is best looked at as a skill, with work you can improve it. Here are 18 simple steps to help you improve your confidence.

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#1 Trust Yourself

Know deep down inside of you, you have what it takes and no matter what happens you are okay. You already know the answers. If you stumble along the way, no problem, make it part of your dance. Most people don’t know what you have prepared to say, (only you know what is missing.) When I go off script, I relax, knowing that I speak what people most need to hear. Trust in your overall message and let go of the details. Breathe deeply and allow confident energy to flow through you.

Contributors: Lisa Hutchison from Lisa Hutchison LMHC

#2 Try Feeling Good From The Inside

Source

Confidence can be difficult if you have digestion issues or extra weight around your middle. Consider moving to a plant-based diet to help detox your body a lot of common symptoms like irregularity, weight gain, bad breath, and skin breakouts. When you remove common allergens like soy, whey, gluten, dairy, etc. you’ll be able to determine what is holding you back.

Contributors: Crystal Nichols from Healthy Living Starts Here

#3 Make Eye Contact And Smile

Even if you find that you are forcing yourself to do this at first (it will become natural), make eye contact and smile at people, yes even strangers. Your expression will soften, and you will find yourself relaxing and being friendlier. An easy going demeanour is always associated with confidence.

Contributors: Caroline Topperman from Style on the Side

#4 Be Real

Confidence does have to tempered with reality to a point. I may be confident I can create a WordPress website, however until I learn how to create that website that confidence is misplaced. I should actually be confident that I can learn how to build it first and then build it. Rephrase your narrative to include any action steps necessary to complete your goals. Tell yourself you can speak in front of a crowd if you give yourself time to prepare properly beforehand or whatever you need to do to accomplish your goals.

Contributors: Susanne Whited from MyBusinessTweets

#5 Learning Leads to Confidence

When you are not good at something, your confidence naturally suffers. To increase your confidence, you must learn from your experiences. At the core of it, confidence comes from your openness to learn and grow as an individual. This means always being open to expanding your knowledge base and constantly refining your skills and abilities. As you expand your mind, you will find you are eager to share insights and perspectives with others. This desire to share is growth in your level of confidence.

Contributors: Jyllene from jyllene.com

#7 Meditate on your Fears

The best way to build confidence is by meditating on our fears. Start by sitting or lying down and concentrate of the breathe for a few moments. Then, observe your inner fears and realise they are nothing but imaginary future events, they're not real. Even if our fears are based on past experiences, what we fear is for the experience to happen again. But this may or may not happen. Fear is just an illusion; it does not belong to the present. If we learn to live in the moment, confidence is assured. 

Contributors: Kedar Nath from The Yogi Press

#8 Breathe and Slow Down

Have you ever gotten up to give an impromptu speech? Most of us will speed through it just so that we can quickly get back to our seats. Instead of speeding up trying being present and in the moment. In a split second you can pull your shoulders down, stand taller and take a deep breath. This will instantly calm your brain and allow you to focus on what you want to say.

Contributors: Caroline Topperman from Style on the Side

#9 Super Hero

When anxiety and self-doubt set in, I do super hero pose. Feeling like a mess doesn’t mean we actually are! Stand up. Inhale deeply so your whole chest and belly inflates. Grow bigger. Take up space. Hands on hips. One fist in the air. It doesn’t matter if you don’t feel like it. Pretend. Pretend you know your worthiness. And your body will listen.

Just like a super hero, only YOU can be you. Not only can no one do it better; they can’t do it at all. It’s impossible. The essence of You is a necessary piece of this world. And all the You that you offer is important.

Contributors: Jessie Standafer, LGBTQ musical activist

#10 Invest in Your Strengths

Do you know what your strengths are? Most people only have a vague sense of what they are. Find out! I personally like the framework provided by Gallup with CliftonStrengths, but there are many other ways to discover them. Once you know what they are, invest time and energy into developing them even more. Research shows people who focus on their strengths are more engaged at work and report a higher quality of life. Focusing on your strengths also increases your self-esteem. When you know what you’re good at, you feel better about yourself and more confident in your abilities. 

Contributors: Anne Brackett from Strengths University

#11 Learn How to Be Assertive

Related post: How Can I Be More Assertive? 12 Simple Steps

What is assertiveness? Making sure you get your way? Bossing people around? Being assertive often gets a bad rap because people don’t understand what assertiveness really is. Being assertive is simply the ability to stand up for yourself and others and understanding that you cannot control other people. Becoming more assertive is a process – there are many issues that can prevent us from being assertive – but when you commit to better stick up for what you think, feel, and believe your confidence increases. This journey helps you better appreciate yourself and understand that you are as important as everyone else.

Contributors: Anne Brackett from Strengths University

#12 Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Get out of your comfort zone, take a vacation to somewhere unexpected, sign up for a class or do an activity that you would not normally do. People get comfortable in routine and it keeps them from exploring and trying new things. Once you have experienced a sense of accomplishment, you open yourself up to what is next.

Contributors: Fairuz M. Abdullah from Outlaw Coaching

#14 Read More

Nothing gives you a boost like being informed, reading journals like Foreign Affairs, Monocle, or MacGuffin help you have a well formed opinion. Knowing more about politics, world news, fashion, culture, and design means you don't just having something to say, but you have a reason to be saying it.

Contributors: Michael Satterfield from TheGentlemanRacer

#15 Travel More

Nothing builds confidence like traveling, especially abroad, you have to adapt to new places, meet new people, and you are forced out of your comfort zone. The added bonus of traveling is you have stories to tell and experiences you can draw from.

Contributors: Michael Satterfield from TheGentlemanRacer

#16 I’m So Dope!

There is a reason for 'pep-talks' before, during and after a game. The coach understands that half the battle of winning is mindset and if he gets his players mind in the space of victory they are halfway there.

Affirmations are the #1 key to building confidence. If you are able to verbalize what you conceptualize you will become what you seek. So repeat after me,  I'm So DOPE! Feels good, doesn't it?

Contributors: Elle Clarke Author of I'm So Dope 90 Days To A Godfident You

#17 Your Walk

Your walk is the public display of your self-esteem and personality. The way you walk is a reflection of your personal traits and current mood… Done effectively, walking with power and confidence, will create opportunities in life that will get you noticed.

Your walk  carries your confidence throughout your day. Focus on shoulders back, chest is lifted, chin is parallel with the floor and imagine a string being pulled from the top of your head, this will help you to stand tall and strong. Hold that position everywhere you walk, have the practiced smile on your face and the feeling of self love inside of you, I guarantee people will notice.

Contributors: Charleston Pierce from Star Walk

#18 Exercise is the Ultimate Confidence Booster

When you build a better body, you build a better you. It's no secret that exercises releases endorphins and dopamine, both of which make you feel great while you're working out. But what often gets overlooked is just how good exercise makes you feel in between workouts. There's no such thing as a shortcut to feeling stronger, more capable and confident, but exercise is the next best thing.

Contributors: Dave Bowden from Irreverent Gent

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Written by Ben Skute

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