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14 Books to Teach You About Divorce and How to Deal with It

Learn about how to handle a separation.

Admitting defeat is hard. Admitting defeat after putting years’ time into something and having so many memories and experiences born from that something which to this day brings you joy when remembering them, that’s bound to hurt.

You better be ready for when the times come to finally sign the papers and officially terminate it. There are many pitfalls that will trick you into thinking that you can fall back on it and things are going to be just like they used to, but that is all an illusion.

It takes resilience and strength to handle divorce proceedings and not fall back into a pattern of wishful thinking that prevents you from going through with it. To teach you how to handle those setbacks, a couple of books on the subject are in order. Learn from them how to carry yourself when facing a divorce.

#1 Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay by Mira Kirshenbaum

Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay by Mira KirshenbaumGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

This author perfectly illustrates the conundrum of feeling like you are in a relationship that isn’t fulfilling but it isn’t so bad that it gives you a clear reason to leave (like someone cheating). It’s a very practical guide on helping you think about the relationship in a way that gives you direction in what you should do.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#2 Codependent No More by Melody Beattie

Codependent No More by Melody BeattieGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

If someone was in a codependent relationship and has decided to divorce, the book Codependent No More by Melody Beattie really helps them learn about themselves and what happened in the relationship. It will help people gain clarity, move on and not repeat past mistakes.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#3 Attached: the New Science of Adult Relationships by Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller

Attached: the New Science of Adult Relationships by Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. HellerGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

This book is a little dry but makes so much sense of why we choose the people we do and what we should be looking for instead. It will really help people understand why the relationship didn’t work and make sense of their partner’s behavior.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#4 Taking The War Out Of The Warrior by TJ Menhennitt

Taking The War Out Of The Warrior by TJ MenhennittGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

Taking the War Out of the Warrior – An Inspirational Journey Through Divorce and Healing Into Empowerment, Self-Discovery, and Spirituality

Throughout a difficult divorce, a life-changing experience with a homeless man, a surprising encounter with a psychic, and much more, this warrior fought his way out of the trenches.

He experienced numerous setbacks and incredible feats, which ultimately softened his heart and allowed him to embrace a new reality, one that brought him closer to himself and God.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#5 It Doesn’t Have to Be That Way by Laura A. Wasser

It Doesn't Have to Be That Way by Laura A. Wasser Get this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

Drawing on over 20 years of experience as a family law attorney, Laura shares her wisdom and insights to help your navigate your break-up as quickly and painlessly as possible. The book gives a great overview of the process and practical, easy to understand advice.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#6 Better Apart: The Radically Positive Way to Separate by Gabrielle Hartley

Better Apart: The Radically Positive Way to Separate by Gabrielle Hartley Get this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

As a top family law attorney and mediator for 30 years, I have seen my fair share of “self-help” books about divorce. Most are very formulaic and are centered on the negative and adversarial litigation process and provide little to no direction or hope for the future beyond divorce. As America’s Divorce Innovation Specialist, I am always and on the lookout for innovative and fresh approaches to divorce that I can share with my followers.

When I read “Better Apart: A Radically Positive Way to Separate by Gabrielle Hartley with Elena Brower, I knew this book would be one that I would be recommending to all of my divorce clients. Written by a leading divorce attorney and a well-known yoga professional, the book takes a fresh and positive approach to the divorce process by outlining and providing mindfulness tools to help readers to not only survive divorce, but to thrive during and after. By following the advice and tips in this book, those going through divorce can profoundly transform themselves, their mindset and their relationship in order to be “Better Apart.”

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#7 After Your Divorce by Cynthia MacGregor and Robert Alberti

After Your Divorce by Cynthia MacGregor and Robert AlbertiGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

It’s over. The divorce is final, your ex is out of your house and—mostly—out of your life. Now what? Are you ready to get on with your life? Do you have dreams, plans, skills, energy for what comes next? And will you be making it happen, or letting it happen?

MacGregor and Alberti have prepared a friendly, straightforward manual of advice and suggestions that assumes every woman is capable of handling life on her own. Help for emotional recovery (MacGregor is a “survivor,” Alberti is a psychologist), practical matters (finances, home maintenance), dealing with your ex, helping your children to cope (“we didn’t divorce you!”), and much, much more.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#8 The Divorce Helpbook for Kids by Cynthia MacGregor

The Divorce Helpbook for Kids by Cynthia MacGregorGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

It’s in the news every day: divorce is tough on kids. MacGregor knows how tough, and she has prepared a down-to-earth guide that genuinely helps. Included are discussions of many topics troubling kids when their parents divorce: reasons parents get divorced; ways the divorce will change kids’ lives; kids’ feelings about divorce; things kids can do to help them feel better; who to talk to; what’s likely to happen next.

This is not just a book for kids about divorce, though. It’s a book about life after divorce, too. The kids in MacGregor’s book are dealing with visitation and custody and straddling two households and making it all work. Maybe it isn’t easy, but it is possible and it is necessary. Recommended for children ages 8-12. Contains a newly updated resources guide for parents and children and a “Note to Parents” by Hugh R. Leavell, PhD, author of The One-Minute Therapist, and Palm Beach Post columnist.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#9 The Divorce Helpbook for Teens by Cynthia MacGregor

The Divorce Helpbook for Teens by Cynthia MacGregorGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

MacGregor knows that divorce can be especially tough on teens, and her warm and friendly guide offers a helping hand to teens struggling to answer the tough questions when their parents divorce:

Why do parents get divorced? How will the divorce change our lives? What can I do to feel less depressed? Who can I talk to about my problems? What’s going to happen next? How do you tell absent parents that they don’t visit enough? How do you say no to parents who want you to carry messages to, or spy on, the other parent? What is there to talk about when you visit a parent who’s moved away?

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#10 Splitting by Bill Eddy

Splitting by Bill Eddy Get this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

This book is helpful in providing strategies of how to identify and protect yourself from manipulation and abuse, along with finding an appropriate lawyer.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#11 Divorce and Taxes After Tax Reform By Beth Logan

Divorce and Taxes After Tax Reform By Beth LoganGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

Beth Logan, EA, explains issues which can arise, how to use the tax code to pay the least required, and many other financial and tax issues. Her explanations are easy to follow and she adds some humor to two difficult topics.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#12 Heart Healing: The Power of Forgiveness to Heal a Broken Heart by Susyn Reeve

Heart Healing: The Power of Forgiveness to Heal a Broken Heart by Susyn ReeveGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

Is it really possible to free your heart and mind of the emotional wounds of the past? Are anger, pain, and suffering blocking you from the love and happiness your desire? Whatever the cause of your heartbreak, it is never too early or too late to courageously forgive and let go.

In Heart Healing, author Susyn Reeve expertly guides you to put compassion and unconditional love into action in practical, easy, and lasting ways. With the insight of someone who has walked the road from heartbreak to forgiveness to living a life she loves, Susyn invites you to heal the emotional wounds in your life. Full of wisdom gained from decades of study with Joseph Campbell, Jean Houston, Robert Fritz, don Miguel Ruiz and her thousands of clients and students, Susyn’s book is a refreshingly honest and practical guide to living a life of contentment, connection, and long-overdue love. This book is brimming with stories, proven exercises, and powerful affirmations to free you from any resentment and anger you are holding towards yourself or others. Susyn does not gloss over life’s pain and struggles.

Rather, she shows how to use them as springboards to new open-hearted perspectives and possibilities, so you can readily feast on the magnificent gift of life.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#13 Understanding Family Law by John DeWitt Gregory

Understanding Family Law by John DeWitt GregoryGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

Understanding Family Law offers a comprehensive overview of legal issues affecting families. Regarding divorce, the book covers postnuptial and separation agreements, divorce grounds and defenses, spousal and child support, child custody and visitation, and equitable distribution of property. It’s an informative read for both lawyers and laypersons looking to learn more about divorce and the law.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

#14 They’re Your Kids Too by Anne P. Mitchell Esq

They're Your Kids Too by Anne P. Mitchell EsqGet this book or read more reviews of it by using the links below

It is still the only book for single fathers that isn’t about ‘how to screw your ex and get custody’ (and in fact if you read the least flattering reviews, you’ll see that most of them are disappointed that it isn’t about how to get custody away from the mom).

As one of the first – and still one of the only – lawyers in the U.S. who dedicated their work to making sure that children had a good, ongoing relationship with both parents after divorce, my book is about solid, plain English advice for fathers to ensure their ongoing relationship with their children, along with practical (and legal) advice about how to prevent parental kidnapping, false abuse allegations, and parental alienation.

Before buying a book make sure to compare price and outlet, we have included links below to several large book outlets for different regions in the world:

Contributors to this article
Corrin Voeller from Prosper Therapy

Tom Menhennitt from TJ Menhennitt

Prudence Henschke from PrudenceHenschke

Susan Guthrie from Divorce in a Better Way

Cynthia MacGregor from Cynthia (Cyn) MacGregor

Elizabeth Eiten, LMSW, CCTP from Boketto Center

Donna Rucinski 

Brenda Knight from Mango Publishing

Lance J. Robinson from The Law Office of Lance J. Robinson

Anne P. Mitchell from DadsRights

Written by Zak Parker

Journalist, writer, musician, professional procrastinator. I'll add more here later.

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